Chapter One -"Our Hero is Born"
A night of passion, with an orange beast.
Pepe was in for a feast.
Nine months later, a knock on the door,
A tiny patter of orange feet on the floor...
Half frog. Half sloth.
Slepe, its name.
Nothing would ever be the same.
Chapter Two - "Empties the Nest"
Slepe’s childhood was full of love and laughter,
Daddy Pepe thought they’d live happily ever after.
Until one fateful day, when Snoop Frog came over,
They chilled, they smoked, they played poker.
With Snoop Frog around, Slepe got a passion for rhymes,
Slepe spat over beats, Slepe collected the dimes.
A new life was calling, Slepe had to fly the nest,
Cya loser Slepe yelled, Pepe was depressed.
Chapter Three - "Dev gets greedy, pt 1: A new token, so soon?"
Slepe got lonely traveling far and wide,
Slepe felt quite lost and needed a guide.
Suddenly Slepe stumbled upon some lost treasure,
Slepe picked up the lamp and cleaned it for good measure.
A genie told Slepe to swap a coin for a wish,
Slepe wished for a pink unicorn to befriend and squish.
A pink beast galloped out of the smoke,
Unipepe had arrived and that horn was no joke.
Chapter Four - "Slepe Finney"
Slepe rides Unipepe, to the city by the sea,
Posts an ad on Craig's List, showcasing skills for all to see.
Satoshi, struggling, spots Slepe's shining ad,
Thinks, "This Dev's the one; Slepe’ll make Bitcoin rad!"
With fingers swift, Slepe completes the code just right,
Bringing Bitcoin to life, from darkness to light.
From a simple ad, Bitcoin rose to its height,
Thanks to Slepe and Satoshi, partners in the night.
Chapter Five - "Dev gets greedy, pt 2: Another new token? wtf?"
Slepe rose to fame releasing his own coin to behold,
Then a knock on the door from someone weird and old.
It was Gary Gensler, trying bring crypto to its knees,
He thought capturing Slepe will fulfill his dark decrees.
Gensler kidnaps Slepe and throws away the key,
Attached to strange equipment, with nowhere to pee.
Farming Slepe’s brains, Gensler's plan takes flight,
Creating his own coin, in the dead of night.
Chapter Six - Prequel Teaser
A night of Searching for Slepe far and wide, Unipepe found not a hair nor hide.
Until at last he picked up his scent, at a house labeled "Gensler" and inside he went.
At Last! Slepe had finally been found. Excited, Unipepe almost shat on the ground!
With his magical horn, he set his friend free. But it was very short lived, his moment of glee...
Before he knew it, Unipepe's neck had been roped. Being pulled into darkness, by an evil old dope.
He kicked and screamed to no avail. All he could do was whimper and wail.
Slepe woke up dazed and confused. He wasn't sure what hat happened, but he felt he'd been used.
He saw a strange helmet and handcuffs on the wall. And he thought he could hear someone starting to bawl.
Slepe awakens, dazed and confused... Familiar cries fill the stale putrid air. A friend is in trouble... being tortured... abused...
As slepe gets closer... WTF?! A horrific sight! Unipepe’s mothafucking horn!!!! Ah hell nahhhh! This can't be right!!!
Beyond the basement door, a freak show has ensued. Is that... a gimp... going doggy on Unipepe??? So erotic! I mean... uhhm... rude! Yeah, super rude!!
-- A grand “VIOLENT” Scene! --
-- Boom! --
-- Hawk Tuah! --
The “horny” scene ends with the gimp impaled, dead. Our hero holds his best friend, Shaking, shivering, demented ideas forming in his head
Gensler! Sick bastard was here the whole time. But the devil incarnate, stands in his way... Slepe decides no survivors at the end of this rhyme.
Burn, Baby Burn! GIMP, GENSLER, AND ALL. Slepe, the BOSS-MOTHERFUCKER rides off, with the dev's chopper under his balls.
The Dev is now dead, likely gensler and unipepe too... But Slepe is free! All The thanks goes to you!
Our hero is back on his epic quest...
What other adventures will he have?
Stay tuned for the rest.
Basking in freedom (and occasional coke),
Slepe gets secret DM from mysterious bloke
The Olympics are calling, Slepe's talents to show
With a smirk on his face, he's ready to go.
An Olympics maestro, a merciless winner
Slepe crushed every contest, even pole with his wiener,
A champ at break-dancing, knocking pretty gals flat,
Shooting bullseyes in the socket, jumping pole like bat.
All gold collected, Slepe thought "Time for a spree!"
Then same mystery mate says “Next stop - Du-bai-eee”
With a cat dubbing tracks and blue dude on dance floor,
Slepe partied so hard, he was soon on the floor.
As the morning arrived, Slepe woke in haze
"Wtf had just happened”, he cannot even guess:
A tattoo of Bitcoin coked right on his chest,
Everything looks disgustingly messed.
Slepe checks on his feed, "Oh snap, what's this mess?"
Pics and rants posted, his life's now a jest.
No fucks though to give, Slepe goes unmoved
Whatever has happened, his dude kept him grooved.
Then off on a jet, his friend's private ride,
To France, where they land.... With nowhere to hide.
Faaaawk.... Cops everywhere. Like bees to the hive,
His buddy is nabbed, all freedoms deprived....
How will Slepe continue his ride?